When I talk to dentists I have often a similar feedback : I am stressed , my work is too stressing . Some of them also desire to change work for another one…but is it really our work so stressful ?
Some days ago I had a sort of epiphany , in the same way Scrooge in “Christmas Carol “ the famous novel by Charles Dickens met 3 ghosts: the ghost of past christmas , the ghost of present christmas and the ghost of future christmas , in order to understand his situation and change his life , I had the chance in less than 30 minutes to do a similar experience meeting 3 different workers : the notary , the fruit shop owner and a business consultant .
Scrooge was warned by the ghost of his deceased business partner about the visit of the 3 ghosts .
In a much more wordy manner I just did a ride with my motorbike in order to go working.
After few minutes on the pedestrian crossing I slowed down . A friend of mine , a notary , was walking through ..we share a similar age but he was carrying 15 kilograms more on his body , a pale face (now it’s august and my town is a sea place ) and a one week overlooked beard.
I greeted him asking : What’s up? you have a weird appearance
he answered : too stressful work ! Everybody ask everything to me and if I move away everything stop ! Then he asked me about my motorbike and his desire to buy a similar one . I asked him : for doing what ?!? you need time in order to take care of your health and body before a motorbike…
so we moved in this topic with his promise to start training in september..
Before going to work I did a stop to the fruit shop and even here I had a similar discussion . The owner was clearly upset , fuckin upset ! I asked him if everything was right..the answer was that this period because of summer they open also in the evening till midnight and even more cause they sell slices of watermelon and they have table and chairs in order to eat right there .
He told me :
I work too many hours a day and all the responsibility of the shop is on my shoulder , all the customers ask about me !
Everybody ask me to cut their slice of watermelon , to choose the watermelon!
Last week I was so busy with some people and a man has been served by an employee of mine and, a certain point , he went away complaining without buying anything..that’s what happen if I am not there!
You cannot realize which kind of damage , losing customers , I have to bear if I leave this place!
I bought some watermelon and bananas and went to the office .
While I was parking I met my neighbor , a business consultant . I asked him again . Hi what’s up? and even him told : “everything is fine unless this damned work and its deadlines. My life would be perfect is only I could change my work with another one ….”
That was my third ghost ..and like Scrooge I understood, I had my epiphany….most of the people complaining about stress are NOT employees but self employed , most of them complain about being responsible about the work , to sustain the burden , most of them think their situation is unique , so that they think that changing work would improve the situation .
The real disease of these people is not stress , it’s lack of organization , lack of productivity , lack of ability to delegate , most of them think to employees as people not reliable , people they have to look after .
We are so focused on solving daily problems to lose the ability to see the situation from a larger perspective.
We spend so much time complaining about our stressful situation and our work and our employees not to see the truth behind .
What we need is to develop other skills , skill more related to entrepreneurship and leadership , yet the first step is to realize that the solution is inside ourselves , not outside.
I am now in my 20+ years of dentistry and I am living every day the slow transformation of my mindset , the way I look at things, people and situations.
Living a great life managing a dental office is much more related to non dental issues .
Living a great life is much more related to learn where to look ….and the key is in our mind.
How we live situations, how we analyze them , how we solve them changes everything .
Jeff Bezos has 2 arms , 2 legs , one brain and 24 hours every day like you. Richard Branson ? the same …we share the same features of the most successful people in the world .
Next time you will yell at your situation , stop for a while , take a breath and look in a mirror .
There lies the solution.
